Hilariously Inappropriate--- Remember When He Was In A Disney Movie?

"There's other kinds of sexual things in the Olympics. There's the luge.. which.. I have only one question. What drunken German gynecologist invented that sport?? What guy went.. ::in German accent:: You know what? I want to dress like a sperm, shove an ice skate in my ass, and go balls first down an ice shoot. Yeah! That would be fun! No, this is for pussies. How will you steer? I will use Keigels. I will flex my ass and go down like that. Yeah!"


"Males cats have that whole thing where they're walking around going.. 'That's mine!' ::squirts water from crotch-level water bottle on stage:: 'Mine!' ::does it again:: 'That's mine too!' ::again::"

-Robin Williams: Live on Broadway

Sometimes There Are No Words...

No words for how happy certain things... certain people... make me. Especially on certain special days. Thank you. I can't wait to thank you in person.

"I Knew It Was You, Jerome. You Broke My Heart. You Broke My Heart!"

I've looked high and low for the quote to go along with this mini rant, but I can't find it anywhere online. I'll keep looking because I'm so mad, but for now I will just post this photo, explain, and say that Jerome Bettis has fallen quite a distance in my eyes as of last night.

The pre-game show for the Indy v. NE game of course included our favorite sports commentators up at their little desk. And they start talking about Pittsburgh's devastatingly frustrating loss to the Broncos which happened only a half hour before. And then they turn to Jerome Bettis and say, "Bus, is the season over for Pittsburgh?"

And he responds with something like this:
Yes the season is definitely over. (This is pretty much true, so this isn't the problem)
Pittsburgh is just a bad football team. A bad team. (And then he goes on to explain the whys and wherefores. Don't get me wrong.. we made a ton of mistakes. We didn't get it done like we should have. But our stats are kind of amazing. Ben threw for 400+ yards yesterday. So it's not that we're a bad football team. It's that things aren't clicking. But if you add 400+ yards to good communication and movement on the field [thank God we're running decent plays again] and subtract all the fuck ups, interceptions, fumbles, and dumb moves... imagine what you could have.)

So don't tell me we're a bad football team, Jerome. And if you, in fact, think that.. then take your damn superbowl ring off and give it to someone who would appreciate it.